Step 003 : Part I

A continuation of my progress towards A Brave New World

STEP 003
Set short- and long-term goals (realistically)

I spent time already listing out the things that were making me unhappy. Now it’s time to free think about the things I want that may in turn help cultivate happiness focusing on realistic goals that are attainable and measurable:

– Exercise 3+ times weekly
– Walk 10,000 steps daily
– Drink 64 ounces of water daily
– Own a cabin in the woods
– Travel to a new international location every wedding anniversary
– Save 30% of our income for retirement each year
– Overland for 1 continuous year
– Build annual memory books of our travels
– Study a form of martial arts
– Take Demetri on 4 walks a week
– Donate things we no longer use
– Trade-up cheap, low-quality objects in abundance with singular high-quality replacements
– Get the 1800ES up and running
– Learn to tie flies
– Become independently proficient at setting up / using / taking down my fly fishing rod
– Become independently proficient at setting up / using / taking down my bow
– Finish disposable objects before buying new stuff
– Cook 5+ times weekly
– Consume no more than 6 teaspoons of unnatural sugar each day
– Get outside for 30 minutes or more a day
– Use the toys that we have before buying new ones or donate them
– Build a better support system
– Nurture the personal relationships of my inner circle
– Write in a journal daily
– Read 10 minutes everyday

That’s about 30 minutes worth of thought and 25 goals. I’d like to hit 50, so I’ll spend some time tomorrow coming up with a second set.

Step 003 : Part I

Step 002

A continuation of my progress towards A Brave New World

STEP 002
Identify my philosophy of life (dauntingly)

I’m trying to answer the biggest question of all : what do I want out of life and how do I achieve it?

Obviously that question is massive, so I figure if I can identify my personal belief system, it can help guide me to answering the question above on a continuous basis.

What do I believe?
– Balance is important.
– Change is inevitable.
– Adaptability is progress.
– Action earns fulfillment.

Balance
Cliche, but true. I believe life is full of forceful opposites. I easily succumb to dramatic swings in one direction or another because I am passionate, but I have always found the most satisfaction when I take the Goldilocks approach. Not too big, not too small, juuuuust right. I used to believe that passion required extremity. In reality, extremes kept me rooted in trouble. It was only after I experienced balance that passion started to work positively for me. I use the concept of balance every day even in simple scenarios : I work out and eat well so I can indulge on occasion. Stripping myself of desserts only made me grouchy and I would end up binging on sugar. Overall, I’ve achieved healthiness. In the larger picture, balance works to keep the relationship with my husband an equal partnership (an explanation of how is too dramatic for this post – I’ll put that on my backburner of drafts).

Change
I’m personally evolving every day and while some things do stay constant, the vast majority of this world is always changing and I don’t expect it to stop. Since I don’t particularly like surprises and change will always be a surprise, I jump ahead of the game by assuming things will change to dampen the shock. It usually helps and (double win) I’m usually not wrong.

Adaptability
It goes hand in hand with my theory of change. I don’t plan to follow the herd, so don’t take adaptability to mean that. What I mean here is that everything we do is merely the result of a developed habit and we can modify our habits at any time. Taking it one step further, I believe that there is no best version of yourself. Constantly assess everything that you do and who are you on a continuous basis to become better. Just don’t forget about balance – it’s important to celebrate your wins and not do 180s every 3 minutes. That’s kind psychosis.

Action
Per the habits I mentioned before, our practices don’t modify themselves and our successes and fulfillments don’t come by default. It requires diligent, and often times strategic, action to make anything become a reality. Visualizing happiness doesn’t equate to happiness. A new job doesn’t manifest itself. You must take action to gain your next foothold.

I’m going to sit on this for awhile and see if I make any adjustments, but I’m fairly certain this is where my mind goes subconsciously and even consciously day to day.

Step 002

Step 001

A continuation of my progress towards A Brave New World

STEP 001
Assess the current state of affairs (truthfully)

For me, honesty can easily be shielded with the diversion of fancy language. To do this step truthfully, I need to strip myself of that hinderance, so I’m going to use single sentences with almost no adjectives and constantly force myself to answer the question of why in an effort to dig deeper.

Current State : I am unhappy.

Why?
– I carry the stress of work home with me.
– I don’t have hobbies I can do without the help of my husband.
– I am scared my dog is going to die soon.
– I am afraid that if I change my course, the new one will be worse.
– I struggle coping with my acne.
– I’ve become a socially-awkward hermit.
– I lack a support system.
– I experience negative thoughts before positive ones.
– I’m too tired to face problems head on and instead retreat.
– I start things without finishing them.
– I blame others instead of taking responsibility.
– I am not actively learning new things.
– I don’t value self-discipline anymore.
– I find it hard to ask for help.
– I don’t actively listen to what people are saying to me.
– I forget my wins and can’t remember why I’m awesome.

Well that was painfully cathartic.

Step 001

A Brave New World

Unfortunately, inspiration did not strike me. I’ve been carrying the weight of a dozen fleeting “I should do…” thoughts for longer than I care to admit, and unglamorously reached a tipping point of annoyance with the vulturous cycle hovering above.

Considering I’m usually a tenacious beast about securing what I want, it was difficult to take responsibility for the fact that I think my life generally sucks. The choices I have been making (and am continuing to make) are eating away at my core and impeding my growth and it’s high time I started digging myself out of the pit I created.

Starting. Right. Meow.

STEP 001
Assess the current state of affairs (truthfully)

STEP 002
Identify my philosophy of life (dauntingly)

STEP 003
Set short- and long-term goals (realistically)

STEP 004
Return to crushing said goals (strategically)

A Brave New World